Welcome to the World!

Posted on February 21, 2012 by Pam

There’s a new man in my life — a very little man. He’s already mesmerized me with his charm and good looks.

A text message woke me up at 11:47 last night, and kept me semi-awake the rest of the night. At 4:30 I finally got up and bustled around, waiting for the call. At last it came.

“We have a baby.”

“Yes?” (Come on, boy or girl?)

“His name is Calvin Sterling.”

I cried. I thanked God for this first little grandson.

I thanked God for this first little boy who will carry on his great-grandfather’s family name.

I thanked God for this precious boy’s daddy who loved my daddy so much, and who chose to bless his son with my daddy’s name.

I thanked God for his mama who has already loved him and cared for him for nine months, and who graciously accepted God’s plan when her labor came to a halt over a week ago and left her in suspense and discomfort until the following Sunday evening. She’s going to have her hands full with three daughters, oops, make that children (wow, I have to get used to this boy word!) aged three and under.

I thanked God for a covenant family of believers who have prayed for him and his parents, and who will stand committed to him and his family in the years to come.

I thanked God for his uncomplicated labor and delivery.

Instead of writing a blog post about choosing the right things to do throughout the day (addressing an excellent question that was asked in response to last Tuesday’s post), I embraced the gifts my heavenly Father chose to bestow on my day:

  • A day with our daughter and her two little girls who live two hours away
  • Little Katie bursting into our house with, “Nana! Nana! Nana!” and an immediate invitation to play Princess with her
  • Impish Victoria toddling over to me and babbling as she held up her arms
  • Calvin’s warm little head, his newborn cry, his bright eyes as he quietly observed the new world  around him.

I had planned on addressing a question that was asked in response to last Tuesday’s post. “How do you determine which things God wants you to do each day?” Instead I did what God obviously wanted me to do today. I enjoyed His many blessings, and I thanked Him from an overflowing heart.

Pretty good lookin' for just seven hours old!

Photos by Susannah Forster and Daniel Forster

 

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“You First!”

Posted on February 16, 2012 by Pam

“Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love; in honour preferring one another” (Rom 12:10).

Have you ever wondered, like I have, why brotherly love is held up in Scripture as an example of love to pursue? It seems like brotherly love often doesn’t look much like love. It looks more like a wrestling match or competition, with one brother continually trying to outdo or one-up the other.

Encourage brotherly (and sisterly) love in your home by proclaiming a “You First” Day. Encourage your children to think and say, “You first,” in every situation possible. Encourage them to let their siblings decide what to play. Coach them in letting others take the first turn, the first serving, the first seat, etc. Let others go through the door first and others sit down first at the table. This should get rather humorous if everyone in the family takes your challenge seriously. Everyone will want everyone else to go first! A good problem to have!

If it gets too crazy, take turns being the “You-First Person.” Have one child focus on saying “you first” for an hour, then another child the next hour, and so on throughout the day. Make sure you join in on the fun, too.

Talk about Mark 9:35, where Jesus said, “If any man desire to be first, the same shall be last of all, and servant of all.” What does Jesus say about the person who desires to be first?

On days when arguing and selfishness are especially bad, lighten up the atmosphere and help everyone refocus, by spontaneously declaring “You-First” hours. When everyone is busy trying to please others, the mood will quickly change!

 

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Finishing What God Has Given Me to Do

Posted on February 14, 2012 by Pam

I think I know what I would like carved into my gravestone someday. (How’s that for a morbid thought on Valentine’s Day? :-) ) Here it is:

“I have finished the work which You have given me to do.”

Jesus prayed these words before Judas betrayed Him. It would only be a few hours before He went to the cross (John 17:4b). Elisabeth Elliot, in her insightful (and highly recommended) book, Discipline: The Glad Surrender, says of Jesus’ words,

This is not the same as saying He had finished everything He could possibly think of to do or that He had done everything others had asked. He made no claim to have done what He wanted do. The claim was that He had done what had been given.

This is an important clue for us. The work of God is appointed. What was given to the Son to do was the will of the Father. What is given to us to do is also His will.

There is always enough time to do the will of God. For that we can never say, ‘I don’t have time.’ When we find ourselves frantic and frustrated, harried and harassed and ‘hassled,’ it is a sign that we are running on our own schedule, not on God’s.

I regret the many times I have neglected my God-given priorities to pursue my own interests and desires, the times I’ve said “no” to God’s tasks because I said “yes” to other good and not-so-good activities. I look back and recall many times that I have been frantic or stressed or overwhelmed because I have taken on more than God has called me to do. I remember far too many times where I’ve felt my heart racing, heard my voice rising, seen my children bowing beneath the weight of my over-taxed emotions and energy.

God has called me to serve Him. He will not lay the weight of burdens on me that I foolishly try to take up on my own. Jesus’ burden is light. When mine becomes heavy, I know I’m carrying more than He has given me to bear. I need to pray for God’s guidance, listen to His direction, and take hold of His enabling grace. I want to finish what He,  my Father, has given me to do, and leave the rest behind.

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Encouraging a Thankful Heart

Posted on February 9, 2012 by Pam

Girl helping DadA thankful heart is a heart that is ready to obey. It’s so easy for children to be unaware of the many ways their parents serve them. We need to help them learn to be thankful.

Sit down with your children and make a list of all the ways their daddy serves your family. Talk together, ask them leading questions, and give them some suggestions. Assign one of the children to act as secretary, recording everyone’s ideas. (Or write them down yourself if the  children are all too young for this task.)

List big things like going to work (or looking for work, if that is the case) each day, reading the Bible to the family, keeping the car in good running order, helping make wise decisions, and disciplining children. Help them think of the little things, too – things like scraping the ice off the windshield on cold mornings before he heads for work, reading a story at bedtime, finding out how to get somewhere in the car, going to baseball games, etc., etc. See if you can list at least fifty things that Daddy does to love and serve his family. That shouldn’t be too hard. (Every Daddy has his weak areas, just like all the rest of us. Don’t worry about those. Focus on what he does do and what you can be thankful for. And if there isn’t a daddy in your home, think about someone that God has brought into your lives to help you. Make a list of the ways that person serves you.)

Review the list together. Show the children how long it is, and assure them that you probably haven’t thought of even half of what he does. Discuss how much they have to be thankful for.

Then start brainstorming about ways the children can show their gratitude to their daddy. In what ways can they thank him? A note or thank you card would be nice. Help them think beyond that to active, practical things they can do for their daddy to show their appreciation – things like cheerfully greeting him at the door when he comes home from work, cleaning up the house before he arrives, doing some of his chores for him, obeying him, saying thank you every time he does something for them, giving him little gifts or backrubs or cups of tea, playing the piano for him while he relaxes, choosing to be quiet for his sake when they would rather be noisy, reading him a story, serving him at the dinner table, making his lunch for him to take to work, writing little notes to put in his pockets or on his pillow. Be creative! Write down every idea and keep the list where everyone can come back to refer to it.

Ask them to put these ideas into action. What will each of them do today to show their daddy how much they appreciate him? What will they do tomorrow? Encourage them to make these demonstrations of gratitude a daily habit. Encourage them with your words, and encourage them with your example. See if Daddy isn’t a happier daddy, and if your household doesn’t become a more joyful and peaceful place to be!

 

 

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God’s Word — The Soldier’s Sword

Posted on February 7, 2012 by Pam

A visiting pastor read this old poem about the Bible during his sermon on Sunday. It’s a good reminder.

This Book is the mind of God, the state of man, the way of salvation,

the doom of sinners, and the happiness of believers.

Its doctrines are holy, its precepts are binding;

its histories are true, and its decisions are immutable.

Read it to be wise, believe it to be safe, practice it to be holy.

It contains light to direct you, food to support you, and comfort to cheer you.

It is the traveler’s map, the pilgrim’s staff, the pilot’s compass, the soldier’s sword, and the Christian’s character.

Here paradise is restored, heaven opened, and the gates of hell disclosed.

Christ is its grand subject, our good its design, and the glory of God its end.

It should fill the memory, rule the heart, and guide the feet.

Read it slowly, frequently, prayerfully.

It is a mine of wealth, a paradise of glory, and a river of pleasure.

Follow its precepts and it will lead you to Calvary, to the empty tomb, to a resurrected life in Christ; yes, to glory itself, for eternity.

–Anonymous

God’s Word is our food. It is our life. May we never neglect it or take it for granted!.

 

(Photo by Susannah Forster)

By the way, check out Doorposts’ Facebook page for some great discount coupons on Doorposts’ materials — $6 off $6, and $10 off $20! Sale ends at midnight, Wednesday, February 8!

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Good News!

Posted on February 2, 2012 by Pam

You’ve seen it… Two children are playing. Child No. 1 sets down his toy to pick up a new one, and suddenly Child No. 2 is discontent. He no longer wants what he already has. He wants what the other child has. He reaches out for the toy and yells when he can’t have it. He fusses and cries, and seeks to get his way. He’s coveting.

Next time you’re faced with this issue, use the following simple object lesson to help your children see that they will never please God in their own strength. They need help. Point them to their Savior, Jesus, who lived a perfect life and died to free them from their bondage to sin.

Step in and instruct when coveting raises its ugly head. Remind children that they cannot always have what they want and that they need to stop fussing and be content with what they have. Read the Tenth Commandment to them.

“You shall not covet your neighbor’s house; you shall not covet your neighbor’s wife, or his male servant, or his female servant, or his ox, or his donkey, or anything that is your neighbor’s” (Ex. 20:17, ESV).

Talk about what coveting is (wanting things that are unlawful to obtain or possess). We are not to wrongfully desire the possessions of our neighbor (or our sister or brother). Help your children think of situations where they are tempted to covet.

Then ask them if they would like some water or juice. Or suggest an impromptu tea party with your children. Pull out a pretty teapot and set out plates and finger foods. While no one is watching you, add just enough blue food coloring to the water in your pot to make the water noticeably colored.  If you’re just serving water or juice, do the same. Just be sure that your serving container is opaque so the children can’t see the liquid inside it. (Use a ceramic pitcher or empty juice carton.)

Carefully pour a few drops of household bleach into another container that you can close with a lid. If you have an empty bottle with an eyedropper, that would be ideal. Place a tray and some extra napkins on your table. (These will help you avoid accidents with the bleach.) Place a stirring spoon on the tray, too.

Sit down with your children and start pouring into everyone’s glasses or cups (leave some water in the teapot).  When the children react to the strange-colored liquid that is given to them, stop and read Mark 7:20-23 to them.

“What comes out of a person is what defiles him. For from within, out of the heart of man, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, coveting, wickedness, deceit, sensuality, envy, slander, pride, foolishness.  All these evil things come from within, and they defile a person” (ESV).

Draw special attention to the word “coveting”. Point out that it is included in the list of things God is calling evil. Coveting is against God’s law. Where does it come from? The heart.

Talk about how hard it is to keep from wanting what others have. Tell the children of your own temptations in this area. Then read Romans 3:23 together.

“’All have sinned and come short of the glory of God.’ No one can please God. We have all sinned. We are all tempted to covet. The colored water is inside the teapot. It can only pour out colored water because that is all it has inside it.”

Tell your children, “We are born with sin inside us. We cannot keep God’s law. Just like the pot pours out blue water because blue water is what is inside it, we pour out sin because sin is what is in our hearts. We will never please God on our own. But God has provided a way to please and obey Him.”

Read Roman 5:8 together. “But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”

Continue explaining, “God knows we can’t obey Him. He loves us so much that He sent His son to die in our place. Jesus lived the perfect life that we can’t live, and then took God’s punishment for sin in our place. Christ’s death and resurrection, when we place our trust in Him and not in ourselves, frees us from our bondage to sin.”

Place someone’s cup on your tray and carefully drop one drop of bleach at a time into the colored water, stirring as you do. The color should disappear, leaving clear water behind.

Next drop bleach into the teapot of colored water and stir it.

“We are like the teapot. We can only pour out sin because sin is what is in us, just like the teapot can only pour out blue water because blue water is what is in it. When we add the bleach to the water, what happens? What is in the pot now?” (Pour to see that the water is clear now.)

“We put bleach in the water and it changed. Now we can pour out clear water because clear water is what is in the pot. When we trust Jesus, He changes us. He is in us. We no longer have to pour out sin. We have new life in us, and Jesus gives us the strength to obey Him. When we do sin, we can go to Him in prayer and ask forgiveness. He has already paid for our sin. He forgives us and helps us to obey Him.”

Build on this lesson. Remind your children when they sin; if they have trusted Jesus, they are free to obey Him. He will help them. They do not have to struggle by themselves. This is Good News. This is the Gospel. This gives us hope.

 

(Note: Exercise caution while using bleach, and be sure the children do not try to drink the bleached water.)

 

 

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Lesson in a Coffee Shop

Posted on January 31, 2012 by Pam

He’s charming in his little black coat. He leans forward in his stroller and makes a desperate, I-want-some-now noise. His mama smiles, gently waves her finger, and almost sings her quiet “no” while she holds the spoon back in her other hand.  He sits back and waits and the spoon travels to his mouth. He’s happy.

Then the anxious sound again.

Again the gentle counsel.

Again the baby’s quiet response.

His mama perseveres, always waiting until he quiets himself before she gives him the next bite. Eventually he’s had enough to not fret between bites and happily eats when Mama offers more.

I admire this mama’s gentle wisdom. How often as my children have grown up have I made it harder to obey because of my attitude, my impatience, my tendency to set the stage for a battle of wills?

A proverb comes to mind as I appreciate the interchange between this sweet mother and her child:

“The wise in heart shall be called prudent: and the sweetness of the lips increaseth learning” (Proverbs 16:21).

Or as the Amplified Version translates, “The wise in heart are called prudent, understanding, and knowing, and winsome speech increases  learning (in both speaker and listener).”

I still have much to learn …

 

 

(Artwork courtesy of Sascalia, http://www.etsy.com/shop/Sascalia)

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One Thousand Gifts (Review)

Posted on January 26, 2012 by Pam

As I think back over the years, three books stand out to me as ones that have especially impacted my life.

  • Mary Pride’s The Way Home confirmed my conviction that children were a blessing, and that we should welcome as many as God wanted to give us! Her creative, entrepreneurial spirit also sparked ideas and projects that eventually turned into our family business, Doorposts.
  • Edith Schaeffer’s The Hidden Art of Homemaking profoundly shaped my approach to bringing beauty and creativity into the home, and fostered a sense of satisfaction and fulfillment in my role as homemaker and mother. I reread it regularly as the seasons and responsibilities of my life change.
  • God at Work, by Gene Edward Veith, led to the “Oh-of-course!” moment when it finally dawned on me that God accomplishes His purposes through people. He has given each of us work to do, and He ministers to others through that work.

I’m quite certain that One Thousand Gifts, by Ann Voskamp, is going to be another one of those life-changing books for me. When I finished reading the last page a few days ago, I simply flipped back to the beginning and started over again. This book will warrant many readings, because I will need to review its message many times.

When she accepted the challenge of listing one thousand things she loves, Ann found that learning to see and name the beauty and blessings around her led to thankfulness. Thankfulness led to trust in a loving, faithful Father, and that trust led to joy.

Writing about her own journey from ingratitude and distrust of God to a life of fullness and joy, Ann draws from her own study of the Word and her own moments of epiphany as she wrestles to process the events of her life. Her writing is open and honest, poetic and gritty. The first chapter is almost torturous. The emptiness she describes, the fruit of her response to pain and deep loss, eventually gives way to the transforming power of choosing to notice and give thanks for the seemingly insignificant things in life.

Below are a few of the many portions I underlined in my copy of the book:

…That which tears open our souls, those holes that splatter our sight, may actually become the thin, open places to see through the mess of this place to the heart-aching beauty beyond. To Him. To the God whom we endlessly crave.”

“…They are just the common things and maybe I don’t even know they are gifts really until I write them down and that is really what they look like. Gifts He bestows. This writing it down – it is sort of like…unwrapping love.

God gives gifts and I give thanks and I unwrap the gift given: joy.

Life-changing gratitude does not fasten to a life unless nailed through with one very specific nail at a time.

…Time, that thing we can’t buy, what we sell of ourselves to get more of what we think we want, what we sacrifice to seemingly gain. They say time is money, but that’s not true. Time is life, And if I want the fullest life, I need to find fullest time.

Time is a relentless river. It rages on, a respecter of no one. And this, this is the only way to slow time: When I fully enter time’s swift current, enter into the current moment with the weight of all my attention, I slow the torrent with the weight of me all here. I can slow the torrent by being all here. I only live the full life when I live fully in the moment. And when I’m always looking for the next glimpse of glory, I slow and enter. And time slows. Weigh down this moment in time with attention full, and the whole of time’s river slows, slows, slows.

The real problem of life is never a lack of time. The real problem of life – in my life – is lack of thanksgiving. Thanksgiving creates abundance; and the miracle of multiplying happens when I give thanks – take the just one loaf, say it is enough, and give thanks – and He miraculously makes it more than enough.

I’m amputated. I have hacked my life up into grace moments and curse moments. The chopping that has cut myself off from the the embracing love of a God who “does not enjoy hurting people or causing them sorrow” (Lam. 3:33), but labors to birth grief into greater grace.

Take the pain that is given, give thanks for it, and transform it into a joy that fulfills all emptiness…As the surgeon would cut open my son’s finger to heal him, so God chooses to cut into my ungrateful heart to make me whole.

Our endless desires are fulfilled in endless God.

To lack faith perhaps isn’t as much an intellectual disbelief in the existence of God as fear and distrust that there is a good God.

This living a lifestyle of intentional gratitude became an unintentional test in the trustworthiness of God – and in counting blessings I stumbled upon the way out of fear.

Trust is the bridge from yesterday to tomorrow, built with planks of thanks. Remembering frames up gratitude. Gratitude lays out the planks of trust. I can walk the planks – from known to unknown – and know: He holds.

This is the crux of Christianity; to remember and give thanks, eucharisteo. Why? Why is remembering and giving thanks the core of the Christ-faith? Because remembering with thanks is what causes us to trust – to really believe.

The demanding of my own will is the singular force that smothers out joy – nothing else.

But when Christ is at the center, when dishes, laundry, work, is my song of thanks to Him, joy rains. Passionately serving Christ alone makes us the loving servant to all.

One Thousand Gifts is a book I plan on reading many times. I recommend it to anyone wrestling to find joy in the midst of pain, evil, and even the mundane, and to those who long for life to slow down enough to enjoy it and to enjoy God. Read it. Then grab your notebook and start naming the God’s demonstrations of His love and grace all around you!


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Thank you, Mamas!

Posted on January 24, 2012 by Pam

After a delightful but tiring thirty hours caring for two of my precious granddaughters (while their parents take a break at the beach before baby #3 makes his/her appearance very soon) , I want to thank my daughter and daughters-in-law for being the amazing ladies that you are!

Thank you for welcoming the privilege of nurturing a new little one in the womb — even when it means morning sickness, heartburn, swollen ankles, and 24-hour labors, followed by sleepless nights and utter exhaustion.

Thank you for waging war against Satan every time you change a diaper, wipe a nose, correct a child, or clean up messes that only a child could even dream of making (right, Johanna?).

Thank you for sharing ultrasound heartbeats, first steps, funny toddler “conversations”, and pictures with the rest of the family.

Thank you for all the packing and hauling you do in order to take your children to church or to Grandpa and Nana’s and family gatherings, or anywhere else beyond your own driveway!

Thank you for the sacrifices you make 24 hours a day in order to care for your children — for loving them, reading to them, teaching them, hugging them, and singing to them instead of just doing whatever you would like to do.

There’s so much more to thank you for, but I’m falling asleep over the keyboard after keeping up with just two of them for one day! Thank you, mothers-of-my-grandbabies for allowing God to bless me through your lives.

And thank you to all you other amazing mothers out there. I am so in awe of all that God does through you! He will reward your labors with a rich and eternal harvest.

“Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her works praise her in the gates.”

 

(Photos by Susannah Forster)

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Sharing for Jesus’ Sake

Posted on January 19, 2012 by Pam

When it comes to teaching our children to share, there is no simple “follow-these-five-easy-steps-and-you’ll-have-a-child-who-shares” formula. Children are born with old sin natures; they inherited them from us. We shouldn’t be surprised when they don’t want to share.

Instead, we should thank God for the opportunity to help our children understand and appreciate what Jesus has done for them – and us. Scripture is full of commands that we and our children will never be able to obey, and that we often don’t even want to obey. Without Jesus, we are without hope. We are dead in our sins and will never please Him.

Learning to share will bring our children face-to-face with this truth. God commands them to do something they don’t want to do. They may even say that they can’t do it. In response, we may be tempted to say, “Oh, yes you can, and you need to do it now, unless you want to be spanked.” This may get the results we think we want – outward compliance and peace. But we won’t reach our children’s hearts with this approach. We may end up raising “good” moral kids who end up thinking they don’t need Jesus, or kids who know they can’t measure up to the standard and just give up in despair.

Mom with girlWe should to take the opportunity to agree with him when he says he can’t give up his own desires for the good of someone else. “You’re right. You can’t do this. Neither can I. We’re both sinners. We can’t obey God in our own strength. That’s why Jesus had to die. He loved us so much that He was willing to die on the cross to save us. He has obeyed for us. When we trust in Him, He gives us new life and His strength to do what we can’t do on our own.”

Bickering and selfishness are ever-present sins of childhood. They offer us constant opportunities to encourage our children with the good news of Christ’s death and resurrection. Facing their own sinful hearts and then grasping onto the love and sacrifice of our Savior will nurture a love that will, with the Holy Spirit’s work in their hearts, motivate them toward true and grateful obedience.

Teaching our children to share involves training their hearts. Read them the words of Scripture. Ask them questions. Tell them of your own struggles and how God has worked in your life. Gently coach them through the steps of laying down their lives for someone else. Teach them to:

  • Make another person’s needs and desires more important than their own. “Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love; in honour preferring one another” (Romans 12:10).

Ask questions such as:

“Who does Jesus want you to treat as more important – this person or yourself?”

“How can you make this person more important than yourself?”

“What do you think he wants or needs?”

“Who made you and your needs more important than His own comfort and desires?”

“Guess what…there are a lot of times when I don’t want to make your needs more important than my own. I want to do my own thing instead of stopping to help you or play with you or discipline you. But I love you and I want to obey Jesus because I love Him. He helps me when I’m tempted to be selfish. And He forgives me when I repent after failing to put you and others first.”

“Can you obey this command by yourself? Who has obeyed this command perfectly and is ready to give you the strength to do it, too?”

  • Treat others the way they would like to be treated. ”You shall love your neighbor as yourself” (Mark 12:31, ESV).

“What would you want if you were this person? How would you want to be treated?”

“There are times when I know I don’t treat you the way I would want to be treated. I’ve had to ask many times for your forgiveness and God’s forgiveness. Because Jesus paid for my sins, God forgives me and helps me when I pray and ask for His wisdom and strength. If Jesus loves me that much, I want to show that love to others.”

“Who loved you enough to die for you? Are you ready to obey Jesus and show kindness to this person, after all the kindness He has shown you? He’ll help you.”

  • Obey God and trust Him with the results.

“Who controls all things? If something happens to this toy you are about to share, could God have kept it from happening?”

“You might not realize this, but it’s really hard for me to lend things that I really care about to other people. I’m tempted to be afraid of what will happen to my things. I’ve had to learn to trust God, and to make obeying and pleasing Him more important than my stuff. He wants me to have my treasures in heaven, not here on earth. He has helped me learn to be more generous, and He has given me joy when I’ve been willing to obey Him and share.”

“What do you think God might want to teach you in this situation?”

“Can you thank God for the love He has shown you by showing love and sharing with this person?”

  • Serve Jesus by serving others. “…As you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me” (Matt 25:40. ESV).

“How would you treat Jesus?”

“How can you serve Jesus right now?”

“God has been teaching me to see all that I do here at home as a way of serving Him. When I use my time to serve our family, I am serving Jesus. I want to serve Him, because He loves me and takes care of me.”

“Are you willing to serve this person in order to serve Jesus, Who gave up His life for you?”

  • Imitate Jesus. “Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus,  who, though he was in  the form of God, did not count equality with God  a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men” (Phil 2:5-7, ESV).

“How did Jesus become like a servant? What did He do for us?”

“How can you make yourself ‘nothing’ in this situation?”

Training our children means reaching their hearts with the good news of the gospel, not just requiring certain actions from them. It means:

  • Praying for and with our children
  • Reviewing the message of the gospel with them
  • Asking them leading questions
  • Patiently coaching them in sharing with others

The challenge of learning to share, like every other area of sin that God wants to root out of our lives, starts at the cross.

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